What put me off was morning tea. First, David asked a question about the calendar - he had a big dream for it that made perfect sense in his head, but both Debbie and I provided logical responses that proved his ideas to be not-so-good ideas. Which made him unhappy. Then the team who is working on the Bandhavi Day program (which is next weekend) presented their plan for the ceremony. They have been working very hard, the plan was made, there was an hour-by-hour schedule, a budget, and a theme, which was "Do Boys and Girls have Equal Roles in Society?" This is a super important theme for Indian students because of the radical patriarchal social structure that persists in India today and is perpetuated even in the school systems. However, long story short, they received nothing but bad feedback from the powers that be and had to create a completely different plan, return to the schools, etc. I know this is brief and may not make sense, but just know that it was a frustrating, prime example of Indian miscommunication, the dominance of authority, and lack of empowerment.
After morning tea, Mercy came to me and Debbie in the library. She had just received a call from a school down the road who had made plans months ago to come on a field trip to Visthar. She had forgotten they were coming, and had decided that Nazar (who was also in charge of re-planning Bandhavi Day), Debbie and I (who are leaving in 2.5 weeks and have loads of work to finish) should facilitate the program for 6th and 7th standard students. Ok, no problem. But wait, you will do the eco-tour. Debbie and I know nothing about the eco-ism of the campus; we were never given a formal tour ourselves. So what did we spend the afternoon doing? Going on a nature walk of the campus and then returning to further research so that we would have information worthy of a nature walk.
But wait, there's more. 10 minutes later, Mercy returned to the library. "Girls, I am never going to let you leave," she said. Why? Because she just heard from a gender workshop that she had committed to do next week but that she had forgotten about. "And I am want you two to come facilitate with me. It will be a great opportunity for you to run a workshop. We will plan tomorrow, because I will be in Tamil Nadu on Monday and Tuesday. Here's the schedule if you want to look at it." I took a look; the workshop is all day Wednesday. "You have some problem?" She asked. "Well, the students will be back and I don't know what their schedule is or what my responsibilities will be." "They'll just be writing their papers. You don't have to be here. It will be ok." But I insisted that I also have been working on a lot of stuff that I need to talk to Roshen about, so she said, "Fine. You talk to Roshen and find out if you can come, and we will plan tomorrow."
But after wasting the afternoon on a nature walk for a program that Mercy was supposed to prepare and forgot about, I decided that I wasn't going to waste another afternoon planning and a whole day facilitating another workshop that Mercy forgot about. It isn't fair to me, and it definitely isn't even fair to the participants - I am not a gender expert. I have no gender training whatsoever. And the thing is, when these things happen it is under the guise of empowerment. It will be professional development, an opportunity to lead. Yes, it would, and maybe if I had been invited to present a month ago I could have adequately prepared and been empowered through this experience. But not 4 days before, when I have other things to do as well and gender training isn't my niche or job description. Sadly, I didn't have the chance to [nicely] inform her of my decision before she waved me off and told me that it was ok, she and Debbie will do the training alone.
Thus is India. Or at least Visthar. and although my heart will break when I leave the people and the country, the work culture is definitely something that I will be more than ready to leave.
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