When working on a college application workshop for high school students today, I wrote the question, “What are your life goals?” It gave me pause, and my mind went rambling.
Those of you who know me well know that I love setting goals. Every time I hit a crossroads in life, I look back at my goals, make new goals, and see how the paths may lead to achieving these goals. I make birthday resolutions of goals for my new year. I have a “dreams and desires” notebook that I’ve kept since my freshman year of college which holds just that – dreams and desires – as well as a 6-year-old Dove dark chocolate wrapper with the ‘promise’ “Make a list of your dreams”. When mentoring youth, the first thing I challenge them is to make a list of their goals, dreams, and ambitions. It tells you a lot about who you are, how you were made, and what you were made for (sorry for ending this sentence with a preposition; it’s the Minnesotan in me).
So I thought about my goals. And I realized that it’s time to seriously reevaluate…because I have achieved most of them. Yeah. I’m not bragging or anything, but I feel kind of at a loss. I’m not even 25 and I’ve achieved most of the goals that I listed: Live abroad: check. Go to graduate school: check. Write a book: check. Go white water rafting: check. Learn Italian: check. Learn recycled breathing: Well, I haven’t really started working on this one yet…
But seriously. Apart from a few adventure goals (explore the Amazon), the funny dreams (be in a Narnia movie), and the very intangible (make a difference), there’s nothing left. Except to run a marathon, and I’m pretty confident that this won’t happen while I live in Bangalore because the pedestrian safety of this city (aka the walkability of its streets/sidewalks) is .46. Not sure of what scale that’s on, but I am pretty confident that it is over 50% less than walkable. Not to mention that every time you try to run, you get chased by a dog. Or two. Or three. Or more.
So. perhaps its time to write more life goals.
Or maybe, just maybe, my life has taken the turn into an era where I don’t have SMART goals, I don’t have a timeline of my life and of what should happen where. Rather, I have overarching themes which I want my life to follow – always seek to know God, be known by Him, and make Him known. Prioritize relationships. Never stop learning, questioning, contributing. Love what I do and make sure I am always striving to make a difference. Live creatively. Laugh a lot.
The thought of a life without concrete goals scares me a bit; I really like crossing things off, looking at the list of goals with a little tickmark and a date next to it. And makes me more than a little bit aware that I don’t want to live aimlessly; without definite purpose. But there is a strange freedom in the ambiguity of themes, and it’s a freedom that lets me hold onto my life with hands wide open. A freedom that reminds me to love what I do and do what I love, to never settle for anything that drains me instead of energizing, and to be good to and real with myself at all times.
Hmmmm…
