Starved for Beauty

I hadn't realized I was starved for beauty.

I have been cognizant of my need for beauty for the past one week; I started reading Ann Voskamp's "one thousand gifts" again, and in the last chapter I read she recognizes her need for manna each day or she starves.  For her, this manna is beauty, and I know that this rings true for me, as well.  I realized long back that one of the reasons I love about India is the vibrancy of life and the beauty that this creates.  For me, this vibrancy along with the colors of houses, clothing, flowers, skintones is a life that keeps me alive.  I know that the first words that come to mind when many think of India are "dirty, crowded, impoverished, unpleasant" but I believe that "nothing here below is profane for those who know how to see" (Pierre Teihard de Chardin) and that even "le laid peut etre beau" ("the ugly can be beautiful"- Paul Gauguin).

That being said, when you get stuck in your routine, the things you once found beautiful can cease to bring you joy.  Not because they aren't beautiful, but because you aren't looking.  Or, as is sometimes the case in India, you are so blinded by everything else - blocking out the noise, dodging bikes, watching your step in the construction-ridden roads - that you forget to look.  In my case, reading about Ann's need for manna reminded me of mine, and reminded me that I had stopped looking.  So the past 7 days I've been looking, but coming up empty.  Why?  I'm not sure yet.  Perhaps that will be another blogpost one day.

Needless to say, although I knew I had a need for beauty in my life, I hadn't realized that I was starving.

Until I arrived in Dehradun (Uttarakhand, India) for a work trip and pulled into a house that had an entrance like this:

 Which had a wrap-around verandah and a corner porch that looked like this:

Was nestled into the Himalayan foothills with a view like this:

Had about a million flowers, including this charming English rose bush:

 And from where I watched the sun set like this:

There were dragonflies and birds galore, and I even saw a peacock strutting across the yard.  Yeah - a peacock.  Sans tailfeathers, though.  We took a walk in the twilight time, and it was when I started to cry upon seeing the white, pink, and fuchsia bougainvillea cascading over a tall picket fence that I realized that I have been starving.  "Thank you, God."  The beauty I had been seeking once again in Bangalore wasn't what I needed.  This was it.  As it grew dark, I sat by myself on the verandah listening to nothing but the sounds of the evening birds and the breeze through the trees, watching the stars come out in the heavens above and the twinkling lights in the city beneath me.  Not only did I need beauty, but I needed peace.  And I am very thankful that I found it in the most unexpected of places.